There’s a lot confusion about the terms cage-free, crate-free, pasture-raised, pastured, free-range, and free-roaming. It’s not you: producers want you to be confused.

Producers put cage-free and crate-free on labels because these terms conjure pastoral images (a practice known as greenwashing). But all these terms actually mean is that cages and crates aren’t used; they don’t mean that the animals aren’t crammed into small, dirty, indoor spaces.

Free range and free roaming mean that the animal has some theoretical access to the outdoors, not that the animal actually spends any time outside. The USDA only requires that outdoor access “be made available.” The door to the coop or stall could be opened for five minutes a day in an area that the animals cannot see, and this still qualifies as free range. (Gee, USDA, thanks for regulating these labels — you make me feel good about paying taxes!)

Pastured and pasture-raised mean, thankfully, what you would imagine they mean — that the animal spent plenty of time outside, eating what it was meant to eat. These are the labels to look for (although bear in mind that the USDA doesn’t verify producers’ labeling claims, so nothing is really for certain).

Here’s an at-a-glance explanation of the differences between cage/crate free, free-range/roaming, and pastured/pasture-raised:

Speaking of glances, on Sunday night we heard Joel Salatin speak at Teacher’s College. Joel is the sustainable farmer featured in The Omnivore’s Dilemma and Food Inc., as well as the new film Fresh. He said something interesting: we think that “seeing is believing,” but it’s not true; instead, believing is seeing. It’s only once we are able to believe something that we can see it.

Whether or not that’s true in this case, the images above convey something I can’t.

Last week Michael and I watched Babe[ref]My friends Stephan (largely vegetarian) and Suni (totally vegetarian) recently watched Babe themselves, because their two-and-a-half year old, who has never been fed meat, suddenly announced, “I want to eat a pig.” Suni’s response was to rent the movie and plop the boy in front of the television. Alas, after it was over, the kid said, “I want to eat Babe.” Of course, they didn’t push the issue by reading him Farm Sanctuary’s report on factory-farmed pork as a bedtime story.[/ref]. It’s your basic anthropomorphic story of a sweet-tempered young pig who mistakenly believes he’s a sheepdog. In the end, Babe wins a big sheepherding contest by politely asking the sheep to do what’s needed (in contrast to the hyper-aggressive methods of his sheepdog competitors). I got a little weepy at the end[ref]I’ve always been a sucker for animal stories. I remember watching the movie version of Charlotte’s Web at my cousin’s when I was eight. My mom and I were supposed to make the three-hour drive home as soon as the movie ended, but I was crying so hard my mom decided we should stay for dinner.[/ref]; Michael did too, though he won’t admit it.

Once we turned off the pretend world of Babe, I went online to learn about real pigs. Here’s what I found[ref]These facts are interesting, and I happen to think pigs are amazing, but whether or not a particular animal is “smart” or has “complex relationships” is ultimately irrelevant to me; all that matters is whether they suffer. Even the animals we consider the “dumbest” deserve to be treated humanely.[/ref]:

• Pigs are often compared to dogs because they are highly social, friendly, loyal, and intelligent.
• They are naturally very clean and will not soil their living area.
• Pigs will spend hours playing, lying in the sun, and grooming each other.
• Pigs have a powerful sense of smell. Their smell receptors are on the surface of their huge, flat snouts, so they expertly root and forage on the ground.
• Pigs can recognize and remember up to thirty other pigs.
• They have a strong sense of direction and can find their way over long distances.
• They can remember where food is hidden and watch each other to learn where food is located.
• Pigs can respond to their names within their first week of life.
• They sleep together huddled in nests and often cuddle up nose to nose.
• Pigs who know each other might greet by rubbing noses.
• Pigs have many different calls (grunts, squeaks, snarls, snorts) to communicate emotional states, intentions, and warnings.
• Piglets, especially, love to play: frolicking, chasing one another, running in circles, squeaking and grunting in delight, and pretend fighting.
• Pigs like toys such as blankets or cardboard boxes (but will tire of the same toy very quickly).
• Pigs live in small, matriarchal groups (“sounders”) comprised of several sows and their young.
• Several sounders may form networks of related family groups, overlapping their home ranges and congregating in larger herds. Two sows within a sounder might become lifelong foraging and sleeping partners, and such bonds occur between siblings as well.

Unfortunately, we may as well be back in the pretend world of Babe if we imagine that pigs actually behave this way, because 97% of all pigs in the U.S. live on CAFO’s (concentrated animal feeding operations). In these factory farms:

Confined sow with nursing piglets.

• Pigs’ teeth are cut from their mouths and their tails are cut off, both without anesthesia. Hogs are castrated, also without anesthesia.
• Impregnated sows are kept in concrete pens with no straw bedding and no room to turn around. Their piglets are taken away after one month (in nature they nurse for several months).
• The sows’ deprived environment produces neurotic coping behaviors such as repetitive bar biting and sham chewing (chewing nothing).
• Piglets are put alone into tiny metal wire cages (“battery cages”) stacked on top of each other; urine and feces constantly fall on the piglets in the lower cages.
• Pigs live in their own feces, vomit, and even amid the corpses of other pigs. Overcrowding, poor ventilation, and filth cause rampant disease and death.
• Many pigs live on slatted floors above giant manure pits. Smaller pigs suffer severe leg injuries when their legs get caught between slats.
• In order to get terrified pigs onto slaughterhouse-bound transport trucks, workers may beat them on their noses and backs, or stick electric prods in their rectums. Crammed into 18-wheelers, pigs struggle to get air and are usually given no food or water for the entire journey (often hundreds of miles). More than 170,000 pigs die in transport each year, and more than 420,000 are crippled by the time they arrive at a slaughterhouse.
• When those who survive transport are finally put out of such misery, they often experience deaths defined by pain and fear, thanks to imprecise stunning techniques. Many pigs are alive when they reach the scalding-water bath (intended to soften skin and remove hair).

(For more details, read this overview of pigs in factory farms, but be warned, it includes photos likely to ruin your day.)

So we have three worlds: the pretend world of Babe; the natural but rare state of pigs living like real pigs; and the sad reality of pigs on factory farms. And there’s yet one more world: the make-believe land of agribusiness. In this world, humans can know and acknowledge that animals are suffering, but pretend the profit justifies the misery. They can deny the fact that causing a creature to suffer is unethical, and they can disengage themselves from their work by focusing on its “benefits.” In this world:

• Giving humans cheap, fast access to meat is a noble livelihood.
• The industrialization of meat production is inevitable because of its efficiency.
• God gave us dominion over the animals, so they are ours to use how we see fit.
• Since nature itself is cruel, it is best for humans to step in and take control.

Of the four worlds, there are only two I want to live in. The first, I’ll admit, is the world of Babe. However, since that’s not possible, I’d be delighted to live in a world in which pigs get to be pigs: frolicking, foraging, cuddling pigs. Of course that’s not possible either these days. Someday, maybe? I’d like to believe it, but I don’t want to pretend.

Facts about pigs compiled from Farm Sanctuary, ASPCA, Wikipedia, Go Veg, and Think Differently About Sheep.

Michael’s been researching where and how to find third-party-certified meat. It seems like he’s been mining for gold in a once-rich mine. This metaphorical mine has been stripped bare by a large corporation that has screwed up the environment and the economy for the natives, leaving behind nothing of value. But, God love him, the man’s found a few nuggets. Here’s what he has to say:

I focused on a single, practical question — Where can we buy third-party meat or animal products? — and I limited my research to third-party certified beef, chicken, pork, dairy, and eggs available in Manhattan or preferably Brooklyn (I ignored online stores^{[ref]Yes, Virginia, you can buy certified beef online; they ship it to you frozen, in vacuum-sealed bags packed in dry ice.[/ref]).}

Sad to say, after about twelve hours of borderline obsessive-compulsive work, I now know where to buy a total of three certified products. That’s it. Three. And I was thrilled when I found the third.

And the winners are…

Murray’s chicken

Murray’s is available just about everywhere in New York, but we’ve been getting it at the Park Slope Food Coop. It’s yummy. We buy breasts for ourselves and thighs for our cats (Kama uses the thighs for one of her homemade cat food recipes. We’re insane).

Pete & Gerry’s organic eggs

I’m still pissed about this. These are excellent eggs, far better than any I’ve ever bought in a supermarket, and they’re available throughout New York… only not at our crunchy co-op. So I’ve been going to Keyfoods, a hateful place, and spending $7.00 a dozen.

Vermont Smoke and Cure Uncured Bacon

I just found this one yesterday, so we haven’t actually brought home the bacon yet. It’s available at Murray’s Cheese in the West Village, which is within walking distance of our therapist. We only see our therapist once a month, so if it turns out that we truly love this bacon, we may have to create more problems in our relationship.

Update May 10, 2010: I found a far better source for Pete & Gerry’s organic eggs. The Associated Market at Union and 5th has them for $4/dozen. I now thumb my nose at Keyfoods when I pass.

As I described in Humane Seals of Approval, there are three national third-party food certification programs that focus on the humane treatment of farm animals:

• American Humane Certified (The American Humane Association)
• Certified Humane (Humane Farm Animal Care)
• Animal Welfare Approved (Animal Welfare Approved)

In recent weeks, Michael has done copious research on all of them, focusing on finding local products with their seals. He’s nothing if not determined, and sometimes I can practically smell his steely resolve wafting out of our home office. It seems I’ve created a monster.

Prior to Michael’s research, we hadn’t really distinguished between the three programs. And given the reality of factory farming, it seems silly to perseverate over the differences between three organizations that are all on the “good” side, with animal welfare as their priority. They each have a different approach, and maybe that’s necessary to meet the needs of as many consumers, farmers, and animals as possible.

That being said, Animal Welfare Approved is very different from the other two programs: in addition to having far stricter animal welfare standards, they’re the only certifier that charges nothing and that limits its focus to independent family farms. From this and other information Michael has found, it’s clear that the other two certifiers are targeting larger, more corporate producers (their looser standards, in particular, fit this conclusion [ref]Some examples: AWA is the only program that prohibits confining sows in crates or cows in feedlots, and it’s the only program that requires animals to have access to natural light and pasture. To learn more, see AWA’s A Comparison of Industry Guidelines and Independent Labels.[/ref]. As Michael says, this might be about money, it might reflect differences in vision or strategy, or it might be about something we don’t yet understand.

In any case, while we will continue to buy products certified by any of the three programs, AWA has won our hearts.